From Soma to Seizures: How India Went From Sacred Plants to Sensational Headlines : DarknetMarketsIndia | Torhoo darknet markets

India the land where sages drank Soma, where Shiva roamed high on cosmic fire, where plants weren’t feared, but worshipped. This was the birthplace of spiritual intoxication, where altered states were a path to moksha - not a criminal charge.

But in today’s Bharat, try carrying 5 LSD tabs, and the Narcotics Control Bureau will slap you with Section 22(c), scream “2 GRAMS OF LSD CAUGHT!” at a press conference, and call it a commercial quantity.
No testing. No potency. No science. Just weighing blotter paper like it's cocaine and declaring war on notebook sheets with ink on them.

This is what happens when people who couldn’t pass 10th-grade chemistry start enforcing psychonaut law.

Meanwhile, the rest of the world - from Oregon to Switzerland - is legalizing psychedelics, using them to treat PTSD, addiction, and depression. Here? We’re still raiding users like it’s 1986.

We’ve gone from:
🌿 Sacred rituals → 🪖 Sensational raids
📿 Enlightenment → 🔐 Imprisonment
🕉️ Third eye opening → 👮♂️ Bail not granted

To the Narcotics Clown Bureau:🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

You are not guardians of health or safety - you’re state-funded scavengers with a God complex, chasing after tabs like you're hunting demons, while the real poison flows freely through pharma, alcohol, and corruption.
May your scales always lie, your blunders always go viral, and your ranks forever stay confused between Soma and soda.





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📰 [BREAKING] NCB Declares War on Ancient Indian Culture After Mistaking LSD for 'Paper With Vibes'

New Delhi | July 2025 | National Clown Broadcast (NCB)

In a stunning display of historical amnesia and scientific illiteracy, the Narcotics Control Bureau has proudly announced the seizure of 5 LSD tabs, triumphantly calling it “2 grams of LSD” - qualifying as commercial quantity under India’s drug laws.

The move comes as part of Operation AncientCleanse, aimed at purging all substances that might lead to introspection, healing, or awareness beyond binge-watching news debates.

“We have stopped a major narco-terror threat,” said an NCB spokesperson, while holding up blotter paper like it was uranium. “These tabs could have opened someone's third eye. We don’t allow that without permission from Delhi.”

Ironically, these same substances - once revered in India’s spiritual and tribal traditions - are now triggering press conferences and arrests. The Vedas may have sung hymns to Soma, but today’s India files FIRs against anyone who inhales without a prescription.

When asked about the weight discrepancy, an NCB official responded:

“We count the weight of the paper, ink, and the dealer’s audacity.”

Meanwhile, researchers across the globe continue to unlock the healing potential of psychedelics. Back home, India locks up users under a law that thinks LSD is measured like atta.

In related news:

A Kerala man was arrested for having a chillum that “looked too ancient.”

Bhang shops across Varanasi were given NCB warnings for “being too Vedic.”



Cultural historians and stoners alike are asking:
How did we go from a land that respected plants as sacred portals to the divine, to one that throws people in jail for the weight of five decorated Post-its?

Final curse from a Tax Paying citizen:

“May the gods forgive these bureaucrats. May their raids fail, their scales break, and their seizure photos always be blurry.”