I had a dream! : CafeDread | Torhoo darknet markets

When I was young and naive I dreamed of building Utopia, I dreamed of a place where we are all free, where there's no reason for theft or for stealing, I remember when I was 12 years old in 2002 I watched this movie, it was about a person who went into an alternate dimension and there was no possession there, all the cars are white and you can drive any car you want, you can go into any store and take what you need, and it stuck with me, I located the movie a few years ago and it was a little known movie not relevant anymore, but the idea stuck with me, then in my teenage years, I stumbled into Zeitgeist the movie and it informed me about the Venus Project and how technologically we should be in a post scarcity world but the powers-that-be wouldn't let it. I remember how Lennon's song "Imagine" touched me and because I could imagine a world with no religions or possession it touched me and I could in fact imagine what he was preaching, then I learned that they killed Lennon and that not only he was driven out of his own country but killed for what he believed in.

I grew up and every personal dream that I had was destroyed, if someone told me years ago that this is how my life would turn out to be I wouldn't have believed them. For me everything sucks, I lost everything and everyone I ever cared for and my future is pretty much ...probably shit. I don't know why this happened to me but I do know that I didn't have free will and things turned out the way it is because I was cursed from the start.
I had a dream about a world that cares, but we live in a world where the "defense" budget which is really a misnomer is higher than any other budget in each single country on earth, we pay so much to kill each other, to defend ourselves from our neighbors even though we are our neighbors, wheat is dumped into the ocean to keep prices up, money is hoarded and quality-of-life improving technology is prohibited all to keep the status quo.

I was a stupid kid who thought the world could be better, who thought that people would just get along because logically speaking there's nothing to fight about, if we abolish the monetary system, we can simply house and feed the whole population of the planet, we can just create art, love and music till the world ends but this is not how humans want it and all because of who? Old money? religious authorities? it doesn't make sense, it really doesn't make sense. My life is wasting, other people's lives are getting totally lost, either in prisons or in death and all for what? it doesn't make sense. It doesn't make sense, the whole world is a fucking joke and I don't get the punch line. Why are humans allowing a minority to keep them miserable why can't they understand that religions are all fake and why can't just fucking get along? I was born to a demographic that's supposed to hate another demographic, but I fucking love their music and the other people's art why can't I just go to this city or that city and enjoy the beauty that exist in those places? Why do I have to feel hate? and why don't others see it the same way that I do??
Why do people think that god sent messages through illiterate people who died thousands of years ago and is simply unable or unwilling to create a fucking Facebook account or something to tell us what he really wants? I'm not arguing about religion, I'm arguing against society sanctioned hate, we are not enemies, Arabs, Whites, Jews or Persians or any other race, we're all of the same fucking species, our planet can sustain us all and the land can house us all. why is the accumulation of wealth in a post-scarcity world even allowed. and yes, we fucking live in a post-scarcity world the resources are enough and the renewable energy is enough, by all rights, we should just be living in a Utopia doing the only thing that matters, creating art.

We as humans, only have one reason to be, and that is to be immortal, we can't achieve bodily or physical immortality so we immortalize ourselves by immortality projects, things that will remain after our deaths, things that will let our names be mouthed until the end of times, and today, in a way, we all can have that but we're kept artificially struggling to keep those in power remain in power, while all we want is simply to live in peace and be remembered, in the words or Ernest Becker regarding the immortality projects of human beings: "The idea of death, the fear of it, haunts the human animal like nothing else; it is a mainspring of human activity.”
and I end my rant with the immortal words of Austin Othman Spare: "Only Art is Eternal Wisdom; what is not Art soon perishes. Art is the unconscious love of all things. ‘Learning’ will cease and Reality will become known when it comes to pass that every human being is an Artist.”

All I want is just to create art, just write my novel and maybe get high and feel loved again. Instead, I'll probably off myself just to escape this prison planet, I'm so tired of the hustle and I pray to a probably non-existent god to just give me enough resources to be, I promise not to have children, I promise not to prolong the human suffering through my off-spring, I just want to have some rest, I just want to stop being worried about money or anxious about tomorrow and the dark joke here is that someone out there is spending 5K on a bottle of Champaign while I can't relieve the pain of my blood. It's all a joke, it's all a fucking joke and I don't get the punchline.