] Tried to Refund Tom Fords Like a Pro — Ended Up a Bartard Instead : Refunds | Torhoo darknet markets

So I was feeling myself the other night, deep in my refund bag, and I figured, “Why not treat myself to some Tom Ford sunglasses off Nordstrom Rack?”
Account's aged, been quiet for years (1 purchase in 2 years, with 5 total years, no returns, clean as a nun’s search history. Seemed like a perfect time to escalate.
I’m already fantasizing about the DNA as I click buy now. Then it hits me - 2 years quiet straight into a DNA screams fraud. Something didn’t sit right. This is gonna be a RED FLAG, and with Amazon burnt then I'll just panhandle.

I start plotting the pivot: “I’ll do a wrong item received play. Safer. Smarter. Sexier.” I find a Gucci pair on Amazon that looks close enough to pass — same silhouette, same vibe. Chef’s kiss.
But then the universe hits me with a plot twist: I’m broke.

Like, can’t-afford-a-decent-decoy broke.

I start rationalizing. My girlfriend could order it if I ask her to front me money, and my sister’s 2 blocks away house could be the drop, and suddenly realize that I’m paranoid and planning on harassing 2 people who barely tolerate my addiction into social engineering for me just to finesse a pair of shades I probably won’t even wear in public.

SO WHAT IS YOUR ADVICE, FOR THIS DETARD?

Should I just eat it and return the glasses? A smoother play than a DNA as my first order in 2 years? help a piece of shit out here